How to deal with manipulation?

Manipulation is an art in its own. Those who become masterful proponents of this art, go on to leave a legacy of emotional, physical and societal damage.  Whether it is at work places, home environment or these days in the world of online toxicity. We all know them and we have all seen them. They come in all sizes and forms.

 So, what do you do when you are pushed, poked or manipulated by people into unwanted situations and circumstances? It could be your boss, your spouse, your so called dear friend, a mentor or your neighbor.

 Just for the mere fact that we are alive on this planet puts us into the sphere of many whacky energies radiating from all sorts of places. The sooner we accept this fact the more adept we become at handling them.

 So, who is a manipulator?

 Someone who is like a needy toddler with a fragile ego. They only know manipulation, or controlling others as a way to cater to their needs. They all have an agenda and that agenda is control.

 Here is what to do when you face a manipulator:

 -       Know your own power: meaning know that the real power is inside of you. You decide the way you want to feel about a situation and you can control your responses. Your manipulator is most likely aware of what pushes your button and more likely than not they do want to see you lose your power. So the best thing for you to do in this situation is to know that you are not your circumstances or what others say about you. You are a valuable, worthy and unique individual with your own talents and skills. And your real power is knowing yourself inside and out and owning it.

 -       Set healthy boundaries: The stronger your manipulator, the stronger your boundaries need to be. Whether it is physical distance or relational distance, decide what your time and sanity is worth? Set clear boundaries, be assertive and indulge in the power of ‘No’. Be cognizant of the fact that your time is precious here and you must choose to spend it wisely on things and people that enhance not dissipate the experience of life for you.

 -       Be prepared for a backlash: What does an angry toddler with a broken rattle do? They backlash and throw a tantrum. As you decide to step into your power, chances are that your bully may not like it and they may inevitably come after you. Whether its name trashing, guilt shaming or gas lighting, the frailer their ego, the louder their voice. But as long as the confrontation doesn’t turn into a physical abuse, there is nothing for you to do here except being comfortable in your decision and being deeply aligned with your values.

-       Do not take it personally: Chances are your manipulator is used to manipulating. So, if it was not you, it would be someone else. None of this defines you or the kind of person you are. Take it as a bitter life lesson and an unfortunate event that made you cross their path. It is also important to not indulge in any self-pity, as it will ultimately disable your ability to fight back and move on.

Are you ready to face your manipulator?

I leave you with a quote I like.

 “Dealing with manipulation is all about reading between the lines and recognizing lies for what they are.”                                                     

 - Anonymous

 Now over to you! Have you ever faced a manipulator in your life? What was your response to the situation? Drop your responses in the comments below. Also, if you liked this blog post, make sure to share and inspire others.